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    • Abstract: GenderCommunication2006 CACUBOAnnual MeetingDenver, ColoradoPresented by:Deborah Snellen - President17713 Wilding Place DriveWildwood, MO 63005

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Annual Meeting
Denver, Colorado
Presented by:
Deborah Snellen - President
17713 Wilding Place Drive
Wildwood, MO 63005
Phone/Fax: 636-519-8890
E-Mail: [email protected]
Gender Communication 2
Gender Communication at Work
September ‘06
Dear Sir(s) or Madam: She said, “The bookkeeper
Thank you very much for your interest in
needs help with the billing.
our programs and the process we have How would you feel about
devised to make the programs run more helping her out?”
eficiently. We are having an open house to
showcase the programs and would like to He said, “Fine.”
invite you to attend. You can bring some-
one else along if you want to. The open
house will begin at 8:30. Coffee and pasties
will be available. Please RSVP.
Senior Staff Associate
The productivity of your office has been dropping in the last few months. Your staff just has not
seemed that concerned that things are not getting done and you have to continually remind them
to have things done on time. They are all fairly new to your department. In the past, it has
helped to redefine people’s roles.
Would you:
_____ Make your feelings about the goals very clear and do all you can to help in completing
the goals.
_____ Avoid confrontation and do not put pressure on people. It is important that they
realize the problem and correct it on their own.
_____ Act quickly and firmly to correct the problem.
_____ Make yourself available for dicussion without being too pushy. Seek consensus on
what needs to be done.
Gender Communication 3
Gender Communication:
Researched Differences
Managing up and down More careful when More careful when
delivering criticism to delivering criticism to
boss employee
Indirectness Indirect when admitting Indirect when telling
fault or weakness others what to do
Equality Emphasize “pecking Value the relationship
order” and status more than who is in
charge of who
Body language Hold distance, less eye Stand closer, eye contact,
contact, fewer gestures more gestures
Requests Make commands or Makes requests
Changing subjects Complete one subject May veer off subject
then move to next
Problem solving Think about it and want Articulate thoughts and
solutions discuss the problem
Giving feedback Direct and blunt Tact and sensitivity
Asking questions To gather information To gather information
AND to cultivate the
Talking Report talk Rapport talk
Talk more and interrupt Wait for their turn to talk
Express facts Share the “experience”
More stories and jokes Tell stories to downplay
to negotiate status themselves
May initiate conflict Avoid conflict because it
threatens relationship
Gender Communication 4
Communication Styles
Circle the 10 communication strategies that best describe your communication style:
Being direct Talking about the big picture
Being brief, concise, clear Don't worry, be happy
Be logical Brainstorming
Use data and charts Imagining
Being accurate and specific Thinking and talking about
Being prepared to prove the future
your position Using metaphors
Thinking through before Using pictures
you communicate Having fun, not too serious
Having your numbers Ambiguous
ready and knowing Always moving
them well
Planning for debate
and challenge
Doing your homework
Provide documentation Loosen up, not too formal
Providing an opportunity or direct
to take notes Establishing rapport
Communicating in a step Personal touches
by step format Considering other people
Giving examples Sharing feelings
Being consistent "People focused" attitude
Staying on track Paying attention to
Explaining in detail nonverbal communication
Planning your Making your interaction
communication "user friendly"
Who, what , when, Being sure to respect feelings
where, how Making eye contact
Being practical
Gender Communication 5
Sources and Resources:
Herrmann, Ned
The Whole Brain Business Book
Hersey, Paul and Kenneth H. Blanchard
Situational Leadership
Tannen, Deborah
You Just Don’t Understand
Talking from 9 to 5
That’s Not What I Meant!
“The Power of Talk: Who Gets Heard and Why” - Harvard Business Review Reprint 95510
Tingley, Judith C.
Genderflex: Men and Women Speaking Each Other’s Language at Work
Web addresses:
www.amsc.belvoir.army.mil/ccampus/Learningcurve.......(no longer valid)
www.afirstlook.com/manual6/ed6man33.pdf#search=%22genderlect%22 (a PDF)
Meet Your Presenter
Deborah Snellen is President of Business Class, a com- Class, she was employed in the field of training for
pany dedicated to training and development options Electronic Data Systems of Plano, Texas. Later, she
for businesses and organizations. A specialist in man- served as Director of Human Resources for MBS
agement development, organizational development, Textbook Exchange, Inc., a nationwide distributor of
and communication skills, Deb has provided seminars college textbooks.
and speeches nationwide and in Canada. She has
been a featured speaker for the Canadian Booksell-
ers’ Association, several of the Annual Meetings of In 1994, she became the fourth person in the state of
the National Association of College Stores (NACS) , Missouri to be certified to administer and interpret the
and the Western Canadian Booksellers’ Association Herrmann Brain Dominance Instrument, a powerful
in Whistler, British Columbia. She has presented pro- survey which profiles individual work style and pref-
grams at three of the International Conferences of the erences. This tool is used worldwide for communica-
American Society for Training and Development. She tion, teambuilding, and numerous other applications.
has presented at several CACUBO Professional De- She will soon achieve Level II Certification, enabling
velopment workshops in St. Louis. Deb writes a regu- her to officially interpret team and pair profiles.
lar feature for the College Store magazaine entitled
“The Trainer’s Diary.” Over 50 of her articles have Mrs. Snellen served as the 2003-2004 President of
appeared in the publication. the University of Missouri Alumni Association, an or-
ganization of over 33,000 members worldwide. She
Mrs. Snellen received a Bachelor of Science in Edu- is a member of the faculty of the United States Cham-
cation from the Honors Division of the College of Edu- ber of Commerce where she teaches courses on man-
cation and a Master of Arts degree in Speech Com- agement and communication skills.
munication with an emphasis in Organizational Com-
munication and Training from the University of Mis- The Snellens enjoy spending time at their second home
souri at Columbia. Prior to the formation of Business in Whitefish, Montana.

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